Which is Worse: COVID-19 Test or Pap Smear?

“You’re gonna feel a little pressure.”

“Ooh, a little discomfort…”

Most women of a certain age have heard these words at one time or another, and “a little pressure” or discomfort usually makes one wish there was an easier way to get the desired results for the performed test. However, the method used at that time is the most efficient way to get the most accurate medical information.

This is exactly how I felt after my second COVID-19 test.

You thought I was talking about a pap smear, right?

Well, I was at first… Okay, maybe not entirely.

A few days ago, I was discussing with a friend the fact that I’d gotten two COVID-19 tests after having possibly been exposed as a few people in my surroundings have tested positive for the coronavirus. I was asked about the experience. Honestly, it was the same test administered the same way. Yet, they were entirely different.

The first time I was tested, I filled out paperwork, took a picture of it, and sent it to the medics. They called and told me when to pull around for my test.

Nervously, I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, held it, and tilted up my head. “A little discomfort,” said the nurse before he swabbed for a sample. He was absolutely right. The feeling was akin to having a gnat to fly into your nose. I just wanted to blow and squiggle my nose around until the offending feeling left.

Not so bad, but certainly not a feeling I ever wanted to experience again. So, imagine my displeasure of having to have another test. But since I’d done it before, the anxiety over it wasn’t there this time around. I knew what to expect…

Except I didn’t.

The second test… Granted, I got my results within minutes, but I think they swabbed my brain rather than my nose. That thing went so far up my nose it activated my tear ducts. “A little pressure” felt more like a complete disrespect for my nasal structure. It didn’t hurt. It just felt like a foreign instrument being placed somewhere it shouldn’t have been.

Thankfully, both tests yielded negative results. However….

I’d rather have a pap smear.